3M Hot, Cold and Room Temperature Filtered Water Dispenser Review


Our human body is 60% made up of water.

We should drink 8 big glasses of water everyday to replenish our fluids, and drinking enough water makes us healthier, more beautiful, and even less likely to fall sick!

So it is pretty obvious that water is important to us... But water is just water, isn't it? Unlike teas or sweetened drinks, there aren't much choices when it comes to water. The water we drink at home is just... plain water.

I'll be honest. I know most people don't do this, but all my life I've drank my water directly from the tap! I know it's safe-ish because I never fell ill from drinking tap water, but I never did any research on whether it's good to do that or not.

When I was told 3M was giving me a water dispenser, I wasn't very impressed. I thought it was just a filter I had to attach to my tap or some troublesome jug I had to keep refilling.

The day of installation came:

I led the installation guy into my kitchen...

Here he is, taking apart my drawers. I was actually quite surprised because well... it isn't just a filter on my tap, or a jug! The drawers had to be taken apart because a tube had to run directly from my water supply to my 3M Table Top Dispenser.

The tube was running under the cabinets so it won't be ugly and visible.

It looks very messy because my kitchen top has so many items... Of all the things there the one I hate the most is the stupid kettle which you can see is silver and black.

I had refused to buy a kettle. I don't like drinking hot drinks so I don't often use hot water. But if I needed to, I either put water into a pot to boil or put a mug into the microwave. The principle of buying an external appliance for making hot water just offended me because seems so medieval that there shouldn't be an extra apparatus occupying my kitchen top space for it. Nor should I be spending any money buying a KETTLE!

However, having a kid meant making milk and hot water is needed. Frustrated with my obstinate refusal to invest in a kettle, my mom brought one from her house, and it is semi broken with scorchtape on the wire. A bit hazardous. And it's so ugly and takes up so much space and it's so scary like anytime can scald people who touch it accidentally.



My 3M Hot, Cold and Room Temperature Filtered Water Dispenser is neatly installed!!

Although this is an advertorial, I just want to say, 100% truthfully, that it is probably one of the most used items in my house, by everyone in the family... and we all LOVE IT TO BITS!!!!

True, this is not the sexiest sponsored item I've received. But it is indeed very very useful and practical. It has truly won me and the family over.

Here's why:

1) Clean, filtered water

Remember just now when I said water is just plain water... Well, that's not correct. There are many different grades of water.

I have said just now that I always drink water directly from the tap. I may have no qualms about risking my health, but I most certainly refuse to subject my toddler to the same.

That meant that if I needed to fill up Dash's water bottle for the day, I had to first boil water then put the water somewhere for it to cool. It wastes both time and space.

Now, I can let him have safe and clean water directly from the 3M Table Top Dispenser because it dispenses room temperature water! I can make his milk and fill his cup during meal times with water I know is safe for him!

Using 3M miniaturization technology in the 3M AP2-G filter,

- chlorine taste and odour,
- lead and volatile organic compounds which are believed to lead to health risks
- sediments as fine as 0.5 mircons
- 99.95% of Protozoan cysts (not quite sure what this is but it sounds bad)

all of the above are gone from the tap water I would otherwise be drinking.

The 3M Table Top Dispenser is the ONLY dispenser in the market that is BPA free! 

Most parents won't let their babies drink out of milk bottles that aren't BPA-free, so if you are intending to buy a dispenser for child-use, take note of this!

Additionally, the 3M Table Top Dispenser comes with an ultra violet light system that sterilises the filtered water by 99.99%, removing pathogenic bacteria.

It is also very easy to change the filter, there is no need to service the machine.

You may be surprised to learn this because 3M is known for stationary... But they do have 75 years of filtration experience!!!

2) Cold water, immediately whenever I want it

The 3M Table Top Dispenser dispensing cold water. It is immediate and very cold!!

The husband and I are both fans of ice cold water. Before the 3M Table Top Dispensercame into my life, Mike used to get his cold water from a filtered jug.

He doesn't like drinking tap water straight from the tap, so he fills up this big jug with a filter on it, then he puts it in the fridge.


It takes up so much valuable fridge space. It is also too heavy for me to carry properly, so when I try to pour water out of it I always spill. It also makes Mike mad if he finds his jug empty, which meant that out of courtesy I should refill the stupid jug if I drink out of it. Seriously, it's way too heavy and cumbersome for me to do that, so I rather just leave him to his jug. If I'm not utilizing it, all the more it makes me irritated that it is taking up my fridge space.

As a result, I often resort to using ice cubes (also troublesome to refill), or just drinking room temperature water which I don't like as much. This also made me drink less water because when it's not cold it's not as tasty.


Now, whenever I want, I can fill my cup with crisp, cold, clean filtered water, and drink to my heart's content.

We have thrown away that irritating jug. The husband cannot stop praising the 3M Table Top Dispenser, and every guest that comes to my house loves it. Some have even remarked that the cold water is just the right amount of cold and wanted to get their own.

I use the cold function every single day.

See the blue button there with the water droplet? Simply press it and out comes filtered room temperature water instead if cold is not your thing.

3) Hot water

Want to make a cup of coffee?

First press this button, and wait just 1 or 2 mins for the water to boil.

And voila! You have boiling hot water! To be extra safe, you have to first press the hot button then press the black rectangle that's behind the cup for hot water to come out. This is to prevent children from any mishaps.

The hot water function is also very useful for my family as Mike, my mom and my helper all drink coffee. A bit of hot water is needed for Dash's milk as well.

I really really wish I had the 3M Table Top Dispenser earlier! All those times I had to warm water in the microwave to make a water bath to warm up breast milk... This would have made my life so much easier!

Oh and I finally threw away the hazardous kettle. YAY!!!


In short, I would like to give the 3M Hot, Cold and Room Temperature Filtered Water Dispenser 5 stars out of 5.

It is easily one of the most useful appliance I have at home, and everybody in the family LOVES it.

In Singapore's hot weather, I always feel so grateful whenever I get home from bringing Dash out to the sweltering park and I can immediately get myself a glass of ice cold water... FUSS FREE.

Everyone who comes to my house always tells me they want the 3M Table Top Dispenser, and asks me how much it cost.

The usual price is $1,888.

But now there is a special promotional price of $1,488!

Additionally, you get 1 FREE filter replacement cartridges worth $155!

And 1 3M Xmas gift box worth $50!!

AND you can get and extra $50 off, specially for my readers only!!

All you have to do is register now HERE and use blogger code “XIAXUEHCD2”.  It only takes 30 seconds!

Friendly consultants from Jestac, the 3M Authorized Distributor will contact you to inform how you can collect the $50 voucher.

If you want to see the actual 3M Table Top Dispenser or try a cup of 3M Filtered Water, you can visit 3M’s Authorized Distributor at:

No.2 Kim Chuan Drive CSI Distribution Centre #02-06 Singapore 547080
Mon - Fri 8.30am – 5.30pm, Sat 8.30am to 2.30pm
Tel: 6288 8290
Email: sales@jestac.com.sg

The 3M Table Top Dispenser is also available at most Selffix stores.

Remember to like Jestac's facebook page to get the best promotions!

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Dolly Wink Big Eye Make


So this is how my typical daily makeup looks like:

Chio right hahahahaha

OK, here's the startling difference with only one side of eye makeup done:



I didn't photoshop the eye makeup at all!

Want to know how to do big eye makeup? The Japanese look to dramatically enlarge their eyes and sometimes they use pretty extreme makeup that some people might find too... exaggerated for daily wear. It's a bit weird to go work/school with getai makeup! The key should be to enlarge your eyes, but in a more subtle and natural way.

Want to know how I did it? Here are the steps!

Let's start!

Step 1: Double eyelid tape!!

Knowing your own eye shape is important. I was born with single eyelids and since I was young, all the adults would say it's a pity that I didn't get double eyelids when both my parents had them. Hahaha in Singapore during my parents' era got no sense of what is the politically correct thing to say one... In the States if you said monolids are ugly, people will say you are racist against Chinese and try to patronize you by saying that monolids are sexy and exotic. Or they scold you for not loving yourself. LOL

Well I'm Asian and so I'm allowed to say... I HATED MY MONOLIDS! Of course, this is not to make you feel bad about your monolids if you have them. Go ahead and feel that they are special and beautiful. But I like the whole dolly look and so I didn't like my monolids.

The reason is nothing racist. It's makeup woes.

When you have monolids your eyes tend to be hooded. Refer to the picture above for the monolid eye in the square. The flesh above the eye tends to droop down more, obstructing the iris and making eyes look smaller and more tired.

When you try to apply makeup, eyeliner goes under the eyelids, so you basically can't see any eyeliner or eyeshadow at all unless you put it super thick.

I was 13 when I first started putting on double eyelid tape.

In the past, it wasn't so convenient and I had to cut the tape myself. I even used scotchtape to cut costs. LOL!!

I put tape on everyday and one day, something miraculous happened...

When I took out the tape, the DOUBLE EYELIDS STAYED.

I developed permanent double eyelids! I don't know if it's from the regular application of the tape or because I just grew up that way... but it happened.

So why do I still need to use this if I already have double eyelids?


There is tapered, where the inner corner of the eyelid joins with the eyes, which Koreans prefer.

There is parallel, where the inner corner of the double eyelid doesn't join with the eyes, which Japanese prefer. Parallel double eyelids are not very common naturally on Asians, but most Caucasians have it.

On the right is my natural double eyelid, which is quite low.

Even though it's technically not monolids, the double eyelids are so close to my eyelashes that any eye makeup I put will be obscured partially...

On the left you can see the effect after applying double eyelid tape! I chose tapered double eyelids for a more natural look, but it is still double the thickness of before.

You can see the difference in makeup later on. Double eyelid tape is a very important part of my makeup routine and I never go without it!

Here's how it looks like when my eyes are closed! Barely visible!

When applying double eyelid tape, remember to not go too close to the inner eye corner where it might cause you discomfort. Otherwise it's super comfy!

Makeup should be applied AFTER the tape is on, because powder on the eyelids will cause the tape to not stay. I tried Koji's eyelid tape and found it to be very long-lasting and comfortable!

Koji's new double eyelid tape is a very very light nude colour, translucent and looks almost visible on eyelids.

Next I'm applying eyeliner on both eyes, in deep black. They also have brown available for a softer look.

I love Dolly Wink's eyeliners!! Not only is the packaging so gorgeous, the liner itself is also very precise, easy to use, and it stays on all day. The control is good so it's easy for novices!

Done in a minute.

Here's the effect! Check out the difference between the two eyes!

You can see an obvious difference right? With tape, there are two visible lines, the eyeliner AND the double eyelid, giving it a more interesting look. Without tape, the eye looks smaller and eyeliner is partially covered.

Of course, you can decide which look you prefer, but I definitely think the higher double eyelids make the eyes look much bigger. Sad news for people with naturally high double eyelids though... There is no tape that can make it monolids even if you wanted to! LOL

Next step is Dolly Wink's famous eyelashes!

I am using Dolly Wink in No. 23. Sweet Girl. It is a very simple and natural pair of falsies that anyone can wear, even everyday!

First step to applying eyelashes:

Measure the eyelashes against your own eye length and cut accordingly. I didn't cut mine because I like my outer corner to have eyelashes jutting out a little. Makes eyes look longer!

The special thing about Dolly Wink's eyelashes is that the lash bone is very very soft, and transparent. When you have them on your eyelids they are fluttery and light... No discomfort and it feels like you are wearing absolutely nothing.

The eyelash designs are produced by the famous Japanese makeup icon Tsubasa Masuwaka herself. They have so many designs that one is bound to be your makeup staple.

I also used the new Dolly Wink's Eyelash Fix Glue to finish the job... The glue is super strong hold, waterproof, and water and perspiration-resistant!! And it also turns transparent after application so you won't see white glue patches on your eyes!

Next step: Mascara!


Why so pretty!!

The Dolly Wink mascara now has a new packaging (I approve x 10000) and has an improved formula with a better lengthening effect!!

I'm using the "Long" mascara for longer lashes that fan out with the help of micro fibres for my lower lashes... gives an illusion of even bigger eyes!


I also applied a bit of mascara to my falsies so they look like my natural eyelashes!

Here's the finished look!! Yay to big eye makeup!!

Do you want to try on big eye makeup but have NO IDEA how to do it? Or have you tried and it turned out to be a huge mess?


Join me at the event and you can learn the basics to expert steps of achieving big eyes! At the event, you will learn all about eye shapes, eyelids, eyelashes... You can identify your own eye shape and learn about the best ways to apply makeup to your own eyes.

On that day you will get:

- Free goodie bag of Dolly Wink and Koji products worth $65! SHIOK!!

- $10 voucher that's fully redeemable for any Koji products on the event day. Yay!

- You get to experiment with all Dolly Wink lashes, eyeshadows, eyeliners and all cosmetics to create big eyes! Very good lah don't need to buy and can try them all!

- BIG EYE Senseis will be around to teach you and help you! When they call it sensei it sounds like they got very ancient wisdom of eye make that nobody knows about haha

- WIN the big eye difference contest and YOU GET A PAIR OF AIR TICKETS TO TOKYO AND TOKYO DISNEYLAND/SEA!! If you have small eyes and you are confident you can make it look very big with makeup you definitely should come try!!


- You get to meet the most awesome blogger and learn tips from her. It's me in case you didn't get that.

- Free and unlimited instant photos!

- You will be the first to preview Dolly Wink limited edition new products and get a "buy 2 get 1 free" discount that day!

- Stand to win prizes!


You get freebies and best of all, learn to be chioer! It sounds fun!!!

Event details:

Date: 5th September

Venue: Scape Treetop 

2pm to 4pm: For registered participants only
4pm to 6pm: Open to public!

Cost: $10 
(but you also get a $10 voucher redeemable, plus a goodie bag of products worth $65)

Sign up now at Dolly Wink's facebook page!

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igloo left me

Igloo just passed away yesterday early morning. :'(

In 2 months' time he would have been 5 years old. Rabbits usually live from 5-12 years but lops usually get 8-10. He had left me before he was meant to.

Yesterday in the wee hours of the morning at 3am I was in the living room watching TV and he was still hopping around and playing with his toy ball, the blue one in the picture. That ball had a bell in it so he likes to push it around.

This morning at 9am he was found exactly like in the picture... His body was already hard. �� Even his usual soft floppy ears are hard. ������

My heart broke when I felt him like that... When Ellen told me she woke up to find igloo dead, part of me chose not to believe her and wanted to nudge him awake. But he wasn't his usual floppy, soft self. He was rigid. Even lightest touch confirmed the nightmare; I didn't have to nudge after all.

I feel overwhelmed with guilt. Sadness too definitely, and a huge sense of loss. But a lot of guilt.

In my old house I used to let igloo roam around my Princess room. He was perfectly litter box trained (bunny safe cat litter) so that was great.

However, after we moved, almost the entire house was carpeted. I continued letting him roam around the whole house. 

For some reason, igloo kept peeing on the carpet (yes he is neutered). He likes to pee at obscure corners like under cupboards where I can't find the pee puddle until weeks later and it would stink like crazy. The smell wouldn't go away and I suspect there are still some pee somewhere that I never managed to find since the colour isn't super obvious... My Princess Room didn't stop smelling like pee till about 1 year later.

I then moved igloo to the kitchen, which had no carpet. I really saw no other choice. The only other places in the house without carpet is mike's workshop (not suitable for a rabbit) and the balcony, which I already bought furniture for and had no space. So igloo stayed within a partition in the kitchen (it is much more spacious than a cage) and often he is allowed to roam the whole kitchen and gets his fresh veggies from our cooking.

To most people who never owned a rabbit, they will think this amount of space is enough. But to rabbit lovers, we know that they should be allowed in the whole house or at least in a room, like dogs or cats. They don't belong in a cage.

It would have been great to be able to let him roam the whole house, but the new house is so big and he is so small... we can't possibly keep an eye on him. And I can't keep hunting for pee puddles.

Dash just got born too, and I was so busy with the newborn. I feel like shit for neglecting igloo's needs and finding all these excuses and I wish I could have given him a better life. 

But at the same time, I feel angry because I know self righteous animal lovers will accuse me of torturing him. He had ample space, he had food and water and hay. His living quarters was clean. Except for his first month after being born, he was never in a cage. I still played with him and I still loved him. Yes his attention got less after Dash's arrival, but I am not going to apologize for putting my human child first.

And I don't know why I feel angry if I know I didn't do anything wrong. Ffs many pet rabbits live in cages all their lives. I guess it's because part of me feels like because his quality of life deteriorated after I moved house, that is somehow responsible for his death. And I really don't want to hear further confirmation of it because I already feel like shit, thanks. 

Anyway I'm gonna try not going to go into defensive mode because this post isn't about me or my chip in the shoulder about being called a bad pet owner.

This is about igloo, my lovely pet bunny.

About 2 weeks ago Mike said that since Dash is no longer using his playpen and is old enough to play with igloo, we should move igloo out to the balcony. 

The furniture that used to be there was gone, so there is space. It's easier access for the family to play with him. 

And so we transferred him from kitchen to balcony.

The space he had was about the same but at least now he enjoys aircon and more attention. He seemed happy. Dash played with igloo too but he wasn't very interested and would just pet igloo a few times then ask to be let out of the playpen. 

I didn't post about igloo's move to the balcony because it was still in a trial stage. We wanted to see if the new living area worked.

And just after 2 weeks of enjoyment, he is gone. :'(

I have no idea why he passed. He didn't seem injured, had no wet poop, or vomit or any other symptoms. His pen still had hay, food (he ate normally and had a bit left over) and water. I fed him some cabbage just yesterday. He isn't old either. He basically had absolutely no abnormal behaviour, was active and seemingly healthy just hours ago. It feels so shitty not knowing WHY! It's so damn sudden.

Two days ago he jumped out of the playpen (I'm shocked! Can jump so high) and roamed the house for a bit while everyone slept until Ellen realised he escaped and put him back. He didn't manage to escape again but could it be during one of those jumps he fell and injured himself? Or had a heart attack or something? I guess I would never know.

I'm also told that since rabbits do eat their own poop, it could be that he had a viral infection from that, which can cause very sudden and immediate death.

I called pet cremation and they came to take his body away. The guy was very kind and asked if I wanted a last look. I gave his fuzzy head one last rub. He would never use his paws to wash that head again. Even in death, he looked so adorable... He looked like he was sleeping soundly, all flopped out.

Just like that, he is gone from my life after 5 years.

I will never see him periscoping in curiosity again. I will never again see another binky or feel his warm body as he leans against my leg to sleep. And I wonder if I will ever handle vegetables in the kitchen again without automatically thinking I should cut a portion for him.

Igloo was a great pet. He had a gentle, affectionate temperament. I really liked his character.

He taught me so much about bunnies that I never knew. That rabbits are intelligent and have just as much character as a dog or a cat, even though they don't make a noise.

People think that rabbits don't like being touched because they often scamper away and appear scared.

Truth is, they love being touched and pet and scratched... But in the wild, rabbits' defense mechanism against enemies is to stamp their feet to warn their burrow mates, then immediately bolt.

So when they are lifted off the ground for a hug like humans like to do, they feel super unsafe and paranoid, because they are unable to stamp and bolt if anything happens. I guess it's the human equivalent of binding your hands and feet then forcing you into a hug. Surely you won't feel like a hug when you feel trapped.

So igloo doesn't like being picked up (although he tolerates it if it doesn't last too long) but he LOVES being close to me. He never bit me before.

When I'm using the computer, he would lie down next to my feet and either sleep there or give me bunny licks. His tongue is small and darty and it's really cute.

Sometimes he would use his head to keep bumping me until I give him a head scratch.

Even after Dash was born and he moved to the kitchen, whenever I opened his pen he would still hop out, nuzzle me and give me his licks. He didn't hold a grudge, he still loved me. He is just easy going and affectionate like that.

You will be missed, looloo. Thank you for all the wonderful, wonderful memories. I don't think I'll ever love any other pet as much. Thank you for all the love you showered on me unconditionally.

Ps: I'm on my way to the airport after posting this. I had to rush it out, or I would have posted more of his cute pictures... I have no time to look through picture archives in my computer.

I'm going to Tokyo for a business trip. It's small consolation that at least I have some distraction instead of staring at the empty space that once was his pen. 

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SG50 Fishcake scam

Some time ago, my secondary school friend Randall (we call him Ghim, and you might have heard me mention him many times before in ancient blog posts), told us excitedly that he is creating a special SG50 fishcake. He is the Business Development Manager for BoBo.

To my surprise, the fishcake is now going viral!

Fishcake looks like this.

There are many articles written about the fishcake, and all are negative.

(Mothership 1)
(Mothership 2)

Here are some examples. There are actually more but lazy to link everything lah.

Basically, here are the things people felt unhappy about:

1) How can BoBo charge the same price for fishcake with the "50" cut out? This is cheating customers' money with a gimmick.

2) Where does the cut away "50" go to? Wasting food!

3) Stop it with the everything SG50! So irritating!

Since Randall is my friend, I had the privilege of asking him to address all these issues:

1) Price per gram

Mothership actually did a mathematical comparison of price per gram of fishcake.

The SG50 fishcake is selling at $1.50 for 195 grams, which is $0.77 per 100 grams.

The Xi dao fishcake is selling at $2.15 for 330grams, which is $0.65 per 100 grams.

Nonwithstanding the fact that people are trying to gei gao about spending $1.50, apparently this means you will be ripped off at a whooping $0.12 per 100 grams of fishcake you buy.

Which would be a scientifically accurate assessment of the situation... Except...


The SG50 fishcake is of a more premium grade, consisting of more expensive fish meat, so naturally the cost is higher. You wouldn't complain about how Kobe beef is more expensive than Australian beef would you? Not that $1.50 fishcake should be compared to Kobe beef lah but you get my drift.

"Duh..." you, being the skeptical Singaporean, say. "Where is the proof that the SG50 fishcake is of a more premium grade?? Sounds like something BoBo is just saying after this shitstorm hit them."

Well, there is no proof. The difference in taste isn't very discernible either to the average person.

However, there is a very valid reason WHY the SG50 fishcake has to use more expensive fish paste.

This is because for the mould to hold the shape of the 50 cut out, it needs to be firmer than the traditional fish paste.

Since the the SG50 fishcake is a UNIQUE CREATION, it is unfair to compare it to any existing BoBo products.

Unlike what people are choosing to believe, there never was a "pre SG50" fishcake selling for the same price!

FYI I photoshopped the 50 away. 

If you wish to do a price/gram comparison,  there is also another BoBo fishcake that is selling at $1.90 per 180 grams.

If you compare the SG50 fishcake to this one, made with premium grade yellowtail fish, then it would seem like the SG50 fishcake is more value for money, isn't it?

But these comparisons don't make sense, because they all aren't made from the same grade of fish paste!!

2) Why do this special fishcake?

During Chinese New Year, fishcake/fishball sellers get loads of sales because families come together for steamboat during their gatherings.

The same thing will likely happen during our Jubilee long weekend. Families will gather to watch the parade on TV together.

The SG50 fishcake seems like a fun, festive item to have during the celebrations, which is why it was created. Because it is fun!

If I were hosting a party, I would love to have the SG50 fishcake in my menu because it would be an interesting talking point for my guests.

3) Bobo is obviously trying to cheat money from the SG50 hype.

Gimmicks are everywhere. Every Valentine's Day, Mother's Day, simi sai day... you see products and services catering specially to those occasions by vendors who wish to get more sales. Even on regular days brands create special editions to their products to spice up their range and jack up prices. Hello Kitty edition? Sign me up.

The SG50 celebrations is no different. As the SG50 fever rises, SG50 products appear to facilitate people's enthusiasm.

Why is a regular scarf only $10 but a Liverpool scarf sold at the match $70? Obviously trying to cheat money right?

If you like Liverpool, the extra cost is nothing. Your scarf is a fun souvenir. If you don't like Liverpool, it is an outrageous scam.

An Apple watch with the same software and hardware, can range from $518 to $25,500. The difference is shocking.

It doesn't matter.


If you find $1.50 for 3 fishcakes ridiculous, then buy another version that isn't the SG50 special.

If you have a problem with companies trying to make more money where there is demand (aka capitalism), you can breed your own fish and make your own fishcakes.

As for money-cheating, look at the rest of BoBo's SG50 offers:

Both products are offering 50g more at no extra cost during the celebrations. And in case you are wondering, this offer is already available before the controversy.

Do nice things like this and nobody notices or cares...

Put what looks like a little less value-for-money (when it actually isn't!), and the whole nation gets enraged. -_-

4) Where did the cut out 50 go?

There is no cut out 50. The fish paste is squeezed into a mould, then fried.

So there is absolutely no food wastage in the creation of the SG50 fishcake.


I can't believe that a simple fishcake can create a national talking point. There is so much misunderstanding in this matter, and despite Randall's explanation to the press, nobody seems to be very interested.

The whole "companies all jumping into the ridiculous SG50 fever and using it to scam money" angle is way more interesting.

That's why I'm writing this to help him clarify. Just coincidentally, I'm also going to BoBo's factory next week to shoot an episode of Guide to Life! This was arranged before this hooha begin... but it is just as well because now I can ask Randall to show me the famous SG50 machine!

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Gay Marriage and all the Reasons to Oppose It

(Sexual content, not suitable for children)

The topic that's on everybody's lips these days is the legalization of gay marriage in all 50 states in America. For non-Americans who don't know, many states have already allowed gay marriage prior to this, but now the Supreme Court have decided it is a constitutional right, meaning anywhere in the United States, gay couples can now get married.

It was a big win for the gays, who celebrated exuberantly.

Many straight people, who empathize with the discrimination gays go through, celebrated with them.

Facebook brilliantly created a rainbow filter for everyone's profile picture, and overnight everyone's facebook feed looked like a thousand unicorns rampaged through it. 

At first, all I saw was approval at this new judgement. Nobody seemed anti-gay at all!! The overwhelming response seemed to be that everyone was pretty pleased.

I marveled to myself how very far the gays have come in the last decade.

I told my gay friends as much, that the fight is finally over, but they said it's far from it... The silent majority in Singapore probably are still homophobic. But with the very vocal anti-homophobic crowd, they don't dare to say much for fear of being labelled a bigot.

Then, after all the celebrations died down, the anti-gay marriage arguments begin to appear, and I realised my gay friends are right. There is still a long way to go.

9gag, for example, changed their logo to rainbow and posted this picture, which is pretty neutral.

The comments were largely anti gay.

9gag also experienced a huge unfollowing from the angry fans. From the comments, we can see that of 9gag's audience (mostly straight men), many may not have openly voiced their anti gay marriage opinion, but still will express them in little things like comments.

From my own facebook feed, a famous food blogger who is also a doctor posted numerous anti-gay marriage articles, some of which are truly appalling.

Like this one, which is the most condescending, holier-than-thou crap I've ever read.

Quote from the article:

"Just we have shown compassion toward those who have gone to the abortion clinic and to the divorce court, so must we do the same for those who go to the altar of gay marriage." --- WTF just fuck off, gay couples who get married don't need your sympathy or compassion!

The blogger also shared this article, which says paedophiles now want the same rights as gay people.

*roll eyes to the back of my head* Totally no evidence of this in the article... As if paedophiles will dare to ever speak up and say "I AM A PROUD PAEDOPHILE I WANT RIGHTS!". Please!

Anyway, whatever, he is entitled to his views no matter how skewed by his religion they are. And out of respect for him because I really liked him before this, I won't mention his name.

I wanted to point out the articles he posted because he is the only person on my facebook feed to be anti gay marriage.

I read all the articles because I wanted an alternative point of view, a good LOGICAL reason to tell me why people can be opposing this new judgement so strongly. He is a doctor right? He is a smart guy, he must have some good reasons. I wanted to know.

But article after article I read, trying my best to keep a really open mind.

After reading all, I came to the conclusion that NONE of the arguments hold water.

Here's my response to all of them.

Bur first, before that, let's get something clear. Legal unions and sex are different things. You can approve of  homosexual sex or be ambivalent about it but not agree with legalizing gay marriage, and similarly, you can approve of gays getting married but don't agree with their sexual habits. Although I guess the latter is a bit weird because most married couples have sex. Let's discuss both.

1) God doesn't approve

Religious people say this as if it is a good reason for everyone to change their minds.

Firstly, the bible (or any religious text) can be interpreted in many different ways, and many religious people have chosen to believe that their God is about love and acceptance, not hatred and judgement.

Secondly, for the vast majority of humans who don't even believe in your God, that's like saying the Loch Ness Monster doesn't approve. ERM, SO?

2) It isn't natural. God created Adam and Eve not Adam and Steve.

Congratulations on your clever rhyme on Eve, which is a totally logical argument. NOT.

So sick of hearing this stupid statement said as if it is so witty wtf. Btw if God created only two humans from the start, how did they populate the Earth without being incestuous? So now incest is ok but gay sex isn't?

Anyway, speaking of natural... Homosexuality occurs in animals all the time. It's really quite natural.

3) The government only gives a legal hoot about the union of two people because it usually results in children. And they want those children to grow up with responsible parents who are legally bound together.

Of all the arguments, I guess this one sounds the most logical. Since gay couples are naturally sterile, why do they need to get married? Marriage is for the sake of children, not the adults.

Erm hello? Firstly, many gay couples get married because they DO want to have children.

They may not be able to do so naturally, but they can adopt or use surrogates or get a sperm donor.

Whether they are legally able to get married or not, gay couples who want children will go ahead and have children. Being unwed isn't going to stop them.

So if you want the whole "for the child's welfare" thing, you better let their parents get married so they have a harder time splitting up.

Secondly, being legally married ISN'T solely for the children.

There are other things like tax or wills that are different for legally married couples. If one part of a gay couple is hospitalized and only immediate family can visit, his or her partner, even if they have been together for decades, simply cannot enter. At the airport, Mike and I can get our passports stamped together at the counter because we are a family unit. A gay couple cannot.

Marriage means that if your partner is a foreigner, they can must more easily get permanent residency or a green card.

In Singapore, gay couples cannot apply for a HDB flat. Houses being as expensive as they are, are not-so-affluent gay couples destined to rent forever or stay with their parents?

All these legal rights and privileges are denied to gay couples, which is pretty unfair, unless you are saying that marital rights should only be given to couples who have children.

But that's not the case, is it? Many heterosexual couples are sterile or do not plan to ever have children. Then why should they be entitled to all these privileges?

If only people with children should be considered legally married, then let all couples be only engaged until they have a child. Only WHEN a child is born should they be awarded the certificate of marriage.

Until then, I think it's only fair for gay couples to be given equal rights.

4) Children SHOULD grow up in a 1 man 1 woman household.

People who say this sweeping statement come out with it from nowhere except their reluctance to stray from tradition. Research has shown that same sex parenting do not have adverse effects on children. (source 1)(source 2)

If you think about it logically, who will be better parents?

Parents who actually WANT a child... They thought things through and decided that they are ready to be parents, they are ready to take on the responsibility. They made their decision because they are financially able, and their relationship is stable. (Rhymes!)


Parents who stupidly shoot the sperm inside and accidentally got pregnant so they hastily get married and begrudgingly keep the child? Even if they have only been dating for a month, or if they don't have the financial capability to raise a kid? After that they throw the kid to grandparents to take care.

Gay parents will always be the former, because their sexual urges will never mistakenly result in a baby. 

If they want one, they have to jump through hurdles to actually get one. Adoption protocol will put them through tests to make sure they are suitable parents.

Many heterosexual parents, on the other hand, are parents only due to a mistake. Sure, some may belong to the former. Many aren't.

I'm sure you have heard of many shotgun marriages around you which ended in divorce or an unhappy marriage.

If you ask me, children from same sex parents are probably better off, statistically speaking, that those of heterosexual parents. So many heterosexual parents are so terrible, just think of ghetto parents with a dozen kids they cannot afford!

Not saying that all gays must automatically be rich or great parents but at least they won't get a child just because they are horny and stupid, which is so often the case nowadays!

Besides, this argument isn't against gay marriage, it is against gay parenting.

Since gay parenting will happen whether or not they are allowed to get married, then I say it's better for them to be able to get married, right?

Argument over, next!

5) Who is supposed to be mother and who's the father??? This will confuse the child.

A child isn't born knowing that he is supposed to have a father and a mother.

These are gender roles we appoint after many years of tradition. As long as gay parents educate their child properly ("your Mommy and Mama are different from other children's Mommy and Daddy but don't forget we love you just as much as they love their children"), fulfil all the appropriate roles in the kid's life, I don't see what the problem is.

Besides, single/divorced parents often have to take up the mantle of being both father and mother. Loads of these children have turned out fine.

Children don't need parents to be 1 female and 1 male. They simply need parents who love them and care for them.

6) Same sex marriage always denies a child of either a mom or a dad.

Wrong. Same sex marriage denies a child of a BIOLOGICAL mom or dad. People who use this argument act like gay couples cruelly tear a child away from their natural mother or father, but the truth is that these mothers and fathers often don't want the child.

The child is either adopted (both biological parents don't want the child, or maybe orphaned), or a surrogate is paid to give birth (rare case), or there is a sperm donor somewhere who most likely doesn't want anything to do with the kid that his sperm created. You can't deny someone of something that actually doesn't want them.

Mom and Dad are more than just the egg or sperm donor - they are also terms for the main caretakers of the child.

Heterosexual adoptive parents can have their children call them figuratively mom and dad, so why can't gay couples? They can be called dad and dad but they can actually take on mom and dad roles. It is just a name.

7) Homosexuals, especially gay men, are often infidel, which will harm their children.

So marriage will make them think twice about being infidel right? How is this an argument against gay marriage?!


8) Homosexual civil marriage would make it even easier than it already is for men to rationalize their abandonment of their children. 

"After all, they could tell themselves, our society, which affirms lesbian couples raising children, believes that children do not need a father. So, they might tell themselves, I do not need to marry or stay married to the mother of my children."

I actually copied this chunk from some website. It is one of the dumbest shit I've ever read, substantiated by nothing.

Asshole men ditch their kids and wives because they want to fuck other women, have freedom and no responsibility.

What has it got to do with lesbian couples???! Lesbian parents ain't gonna make asshole men any less assholey by not existing!! Ridiculous!

If you think lesbian parents will affect dad abandonment because they see that 2 women can raise a child, why don't you also say the opposite is true? That a man seeing that two men can also raise a child, perhaps he will be heartened and think he can do it too.

Lame. Next.

9) Comparison to Incest

One of the arguments that people love to put forth is that supporters of gay marriage should not be hypocrites and should also support incest.

After, incest is also attraction to what is different from the norm. It could also be between two consenting adults.


Yes, you can marry your family members, legally and legitimately. Surprise!

So arguing that people who are pro gay marriage also also support incestuous marriage is redundant. It is legal, never been illegal, so there is no notion to support.

However, once that marriage is consummated, the sexual act itself is illegal. You cannot have sex with your nucleus family.

The law exists to protect an innocent child from being born out of that union because it probably will end up with genetic deformities.

When a sex act involves harming a minor, then obviously nobody supports it. Is it fair to draw a parallel to gay sex, where nobody is harmed?

What about incestuous sex which doesn't result in pregnancy? Like if both parties went for sterilization?

My personal opinion is that if brother wants to fuck/marry sister, that's their business, as long as they don't get pregnant. I don't really give a crap as they aren't harming anyone. None of my beeswax. Of course I find the idea distressing and disturbing, but after reading Middlesex (it's an awesome book) and watching Game of Thrones and seeing my hamsters go at it, I guess such attraction does happen. O_O

I draw the line at parents having sex with their children because I find that the children, even if they are consenting adults, must be in some way manipulated or educated by the parents into thinking this is ok.

So yup. Conclusion: No need to support incestuous marriage as it is legal; if people want to have incestuous sex that's their business if they aren't harming anyone and don't get pregnant.

10) Comparison to sexual deviants/fetishes

People also love to compare gay sex to various sexual fetishes, and how the public will soon be forced to also accept these fetishes as "normal".

Besides, they say, if gays can marry gays, then what's to stop paedophiles from marrying children or a man from marrying his dog?

10a) Paedophilia

I don't even understand why I have to explain this.

The glaring difference is CONSENT.

Children cannot make life decisions that are supposed to last for a lifetime (marriage), nor are they emotionally developed enough to say yes to sex without understanding the consequences, ok?


I can't, I just can't. People are too stupid.

As for the idiots claiming that because gays are asking for equal rights to get married, paedophiles will now do the same?


Do you HONESTLY believe that?

If yes, you need to jump off a cliff.

10b) Bestiality

Again, a man cannot marry his dog because his dog is incapable of giving consent. Even if the dog shows it obviously loves its owner, the dog cannot possibly understand the notion or consequences of marriage. So no, no animal marriage, ok?

With regards to sex with animals... Now here is where it gets a little iffy.

The mere idea of this will probably set most people gagging. I guess it's safe to say that this isn't to everybody's taste. Bestiality is illegal in most countries. It is considered animal cruelty to do sexual acts to an animal, because they cannot give consent, right?

I must admit that when I was younger, there was no doubt in my mind that bestiality is wrong, it is beyond disgusting, and everyone who does it is a pervert who should be locked up in jail (and probably not allowed to be near the animals in the jail if any).

Reddit changed everything for me. Two of my friends linked me to an IAMA article about someone who has sex with his dogs.

(Article 1)(Article 2)

If the dog is the one humping him, isn't it consent? For further discussion, read THIS. It is very interesting.

We can neuter our animals, force them to breed for our profit, slaughter them for meat, but it isn't ok to allow them to hump us? It does seem a bit unfair, doesn't it? Afterall, cows would rather have sex with you than to be made into a cheeseburger. Maybe the issue here isn't really animal cruelty in some cases. (Of course you shouldn't force yourself on an animal too small for your genitals or is obviously unwilling and shrieking. Or in the reverse hurt yourself by being impaled with giant animal penises.)

Anyway, whatever. I'm not here to champion for the rights of zoophiles or that of animals. I eat the latter, can't talk so much.

But it is food for thought.

But no, just because gay marriage is now legal in 50 states will not suddenly cause everyone to begin having sex with animals, ok? It remains a very niche sexual preference that few can accept.

10c) Necrophilia

I can't. Desecrating a corpse without consent. Upsets the beheaved loved ones. Not the same as gay sex. Sigh... It is an insult to Blogger.com's server space to have to explain this.

11) I feel like gays are forcing gay marriage down my throat and I don't like that. Why can't I just say I don't agree with it without being labelled a bigot? It simply doesn't feel right to me, can't that be a reason?

No, it can't. 

If you can't find a logical reason to oppose it, then simply be ambivalent or apathetic about it. You don't have to care about the issue. If you are straight, it most likely won't affect you in any real way. But if you are against it, then you better give a good reason other than an emotional knee-jerk response.

It is very easy for you to say "It just doesn't feel right" and decide to take away the rights of other people, but for the people affected, it makes a HUGE difference to their lives.

In the past, many have probably voted against abolishing slavery or the right for women to vote simply because "it just doesn't feel right". No other reason, except you are resistant to change.

How would you feel if you are fighting for something you feel is the right thing to do and others oppose you just because? Don't even bother to give you a logical reason, except they don't like it? Won't you find that very insulting and get angry?

12) Gay sex is disgusting

This, at the end of the day, is the reason why anyone would oppose gay marriage. They simply find gay sex disgusting.

And because of that, they find all sort of nonsense reasons to justify their feelings.

Gays have no rights to be all huffy and offended just because someone tells them that gay sex is gross. 
Just as homosexuals have no control over what they find attractive, other people have no control over what they find disgusting - so don't be hypocrites when asking for acceptance! 
Just mention to a gay guy about licking a cunt or a lesbian about male penetration and surely their response is EWWWW. (Witnessed it many times) So if gays can find heterosexual sex gross, straight people are allowed to find your sexual proclivities gross too.

When you first found out what (heterosexual) sex was, what were your thoughts? I was 12 when a friend told me about it, she found her uncle's porn video tapes and saw it.


That was my reaction. I had thought people kissed and slept on the same bed and the woman will get pregnant the next day.

Well... Let's just say that Dash wasn't conceived that way. LOL... Which goes to show the best of us eat our words.

If you find something disgusting, it is easy to also decide that it is wrong, sick, and shouldn't be allowed. 

And that the people who like it, must be either crazy, perverse, ignorant, or has to be "fixed" in some way.

Grow up. Just because you find celery disgusting doesn't mean other people shouldn't be allowed to eat it.

A mature person separates his emotions from his judgement. It is hard to do so, I'll admit it. Being an emotional person, I still wish there are laws against all the things I dislike (ban parsley and crocs), but a small part of me knows that isn't right.

Read a sentence on reddit which pretty much sums up this post:

"Just because you find it disgusting doesn't mean that it's reprehensible."

Are your feelings about gay sex affecting your opinion on gay marriage? If yes, you need to take those feelings out of the equation and think again.


So there you have all my response to all the reasons why people are opposing gay marriage. I find each and every reason pretty invalid, but if you can come up with a good, logical argument, I welcome your views on it.

The only reason that cannot be argued with is 12) Gay sex is disgusting.

If someone feels that way, nothing will change their opinion.

Personally, I find anal sex disgusting (whether on females or males), and no amount of reading up on it or talking to people who engage in it will change it for me. I tell my gay friends my opinion and they laugh about it. I don't like the act; it doesn't mean I don't like the people who perform the act.

So if you find homosexual behaviour disgusting, so be it.**

But those who oppose gay marriage for this reason...


That, I really cannot stand. 

Don't act like you are so much more morally upright, educated, informed than others. 

Don't share articles that use fake science and statistics to get invalid arguments across.


Don't act like it is for the children.

Worst of all don't tell me you pray for the gays and will show compassion towards them despite your disgust with them. JUST FUCK OFF.

Just say it as it is.

You don't like it because you find it disgusting.

Great, then people will know to simply dismiss your opinion as it is a personal one with no bearing on society's welfare.

Or they can let you know frankly that they find you disgusting too.

(**Of course, you shouldn't be unkind or insensitive about your disgust, just like it isn't nice to tell someone an outfit makes them look fat, even though you truly feel that way and there is nothing wrong with feeling that way)

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